Tuesday 5 January 2010

Red Sky

It seems like a long time since my last proper post. That may be because I travelled back in time to Ancient Greece and lived there for two years, and have only just returned to the present. It's probably not that though, as it didn't happen. Though I do seem to be wearing some sort of toga...

I toyed with the idea of doing an ever-so-original review of the decade, but no-one wants to read another one of those. The arbitrariness of decades makes it seem kind of spurious. I might as well review the last hundred nights, or every year with a 3 in it.

I could do that...

No. No, I probably shouldn't.

***

There was a beautiful sunrise this morning, over the frosty trees and wilderness by the side of our building. I should have taken a picture, but it was too early to operate my phone/brain. It was a real burning red, like a nuclear sunset.

Red sky in morning, shepherds' warning.

I think it's a warning for shepherds, rather than one by them. Even a shepherd can't martial the sky colours. You can't round the light spectrum into a pen. There's no whistle for that; no sky-dog.

(I don't really know what shepherds do)

Red sky at night, shepherds' delight.

That's pretty unequivocal. Not just neutrality or approval. Delight. Shepherds aren't usually represented as delightful. They're usually gruff and solitary. But a red sky at night will fill them with such glee that they'll skip through the paddock (I don't really know what shepherds do) and dance about. Maybe they'll propose to Little Bo Peep if she's over the age of consent.

Passing travellers might see the shepherd spinning like Julie Andrews, lit up by the crimson sky, and say "that shepherd was a sheer delight!"

And they'd be correct to do so.

I'm thinking of marketing a sugary, mutton-based whipped dessert called Shepherds' Delight.

There: I thought of it. It has been thought. So let's not give it any more thought. I think it's had enough.

I don't think we have all the red sky possibilities covered with that rhyme. What about other times of day?

Red sky at brunch, shepherds are a shifty bunch

Red sky at noon, sandwiches soon

Red sky at six, maybe have a Twix?

Red sky all day, you're probably wearing red-tinted glasses

Which of course leads to the ultimate paradox of a shepherd viewing the morning sky through rose-coloured spectacles.

What then?

What then?

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